Sunday, October 11, 2015

Guess What I Did Last Weekend

You'd never  guess what I did last Saturday. I attended my former husband's wedding. (Our marriage was declared null and void from the very beginning both by the church and state so technically there was no marriage to begin with but I don't know what else to call him. And besides, I don't want to just call him my son's father because I want to validate the legitimacy of my son's birth.)

So anyway, I attended the occasion together with my son and my husband,  Ruel who is truly such a good sport.   Love him!

My son  played A Thousand Years on his violin for the bridal march and he also acted as a cord sponsor.
This is my son and the other cord sponsor during  the march of the entourage.  I wanted to post the video of him playing A Thousand Years but it was upside down and I didn't know how to rotate it because I couldn't see any option to do so.

    Maybe many of you are wondering how it feels like to see a man you once married marry someone else right in front of your very eyes.  It felt weird. But I sincerely felt happy for them. For many years, I have carried this guilty feeling that I somehow ruined Fidel's  life. He was my first boyfriend and I was 23 when I married him, I was so immature. I expected so much, I expected something like a romantic movie and when I didn't get it, I was disillusioned and became unhappy. I focused on the things he did wrong, and didn't see what he was doing right. I made excuses for the things I did wrong and saw myself as the only victim in our situation.  Now, seeing him happy with another woman, I felt happy too. I  found my happy-ever-after almost three years ago and now he has found his and I just wish them all the best. I pray for their happiness but most specially, I pray that he will become an even better father to our son now that he is happy with his wife.

The newlyweds...and yes, I was the one who took this photo. :)

Two of his brothers were there and though I don't know what kind of story has reached their ears regarding the reason I wanted to have our marriage annulled, they were still the same warm people that they've always been to me. They kissed me and hugged me and never showed any sign of ill feelings towards me. When I told them that it was time for me, Ruel and  my son to leave, his two brothers hugged and kissed me and one of them whispered as he hugged me tight, "You're still my sister."  It was an emotional moment for me because I easily get touched by gestures like this.

Ruel and I had our picture taken with Fidel's granddaughter. Yes, he has a granddaughter from his nephew.   Our sweet Sofia should be almost as old as she is now had Sofia been alive.

This is my son with his Grandpa Fernando from whom he got his second name.  It was so sad seeing him so old and so frail.  He looked so handsome and so strong eighteen years ago when I married his son.

Generally, I was glad that the occasion gave my son a chance to bond with his relatives in his dad's side.  He seldom sees them as they live in faraway Zamboanga City in the island of Mindanao.  And this time, he was able to have some sort of a jamming session with them when the program was over and a lot of the guests had left.  One time, he played "Stand by Me" on the keyboard while his cousin, Iker sang.  He also played two Beatles songs on the electric guitar while his Uncle Balby sang the lyrics.  I loved listening to them and took lots of pictures.  It was truly a moment worth remembering.

With Cousin Iker

My boy and his dad.

I hope and pray that my son is not sad about his dad marrying and that it won't affect him negatively.  I hope he knows how much we love him, and that no matter who my husband is and who his father's wife is, he is our son and though his dad and I live separate lives, we are still his family.  It's just that his family is bigger than most, because he has two dads and now, two moms.  But of course, it is I who loves him best. :)


  1. It's fascinating and amazing that you have kept a great relationship with your ex-husband and in-laws. Indeed, this is very good for your son knowing he is loved and that he can rely on this positive atmosphere between that of his Dad's family and his Mom

    1. Yes, they are very nice and warm people.


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